Procrastination

Do you remember that that old Carly Simon song, Anticipation?  In the song she reflects on these lines, she bemoans them actually:

Anticipation, anticipation,

 is making me late, 

is keeping me waitin'

I was talking with a sweet friend of mine today about a struggle we have in common only it's not anticipation, it's procrastination.  I feel as though we could write our own hit song but instead of the above chorus we would be reflecting, oops I mean bemoaning it like this:

Procrastination, procrastination

is keeping me late,

is keeping life waitin'

The Oxford English dictionary defines procrastination as: V. To put off doing something, especially out of habitual carelessness or laziness.  To postpone or delay needlessly. Or as defer[ing] action without good reason.  OUCH!! 

Why oh why do I procrastinate?  I've got several theories going on, keep in mind they are just that theories.  I'm sure this checklist or combination there-of could go on and on.  In no particular order here's what I have so far:

• Pride - Really it's probably more like self-pride. In a twisted kind of way, I seem to take pride in procrastinating.  I'm finally realizing that saying 'yes' to everything isn't good and neither is saying 'no' a bad thing.  
• Rebellion - This is me in a conversation with myself, "You do realize XYZ needs to be completed?"  "I'll get to said project when I get to it, stop reminding me that it isn't close to finished!"  Does anyone else have these little self-pep talks?
• Selfishness - I want to do what I want to do first.  Or could it be I'm really dreading doing XYZ so I continue to put it off. 
• Martyrdom - One of definition says martyrdom is a display of feigned or exaggerated suffering.  Could it be I am procrastinating just so I can draw attention to myself or pity from others?  YIKES 
• Laziness - I confess laziness just comes so easily to me, blatantly easy in fact.  OH MY GOODNESS, can anyone else relate?
• Control Issues - Am I afraid of failing, falling just a bit short in another's eyes?   At other times my life seems so out-of-control, I fool myself into thinking I work better under-pressure.  I don't ever recall that truly working out for me.  If I'm honest, it's more like God rescues from the very mess I've created for myself.  Not every time mind you, sometimes.  

Ecclesiastes 11:4 says, "If you wait for perfect conditions, you will never get anything done."

God has been showing me some not very pretty things about the heart issues behind my procrastinating.  He tells me to seek Him first when making a decision.  Not make the decision and then asking Him to bless it.

"Seek first the kingdom of God

above all else,

and live righteously,

and he will give you everything you need."

Matthew 6:33 (emphasis mine)

My prayer:  In Jesus name I pray, Lord help me realize when I'm procrastinating.  To bring light to the hidden places of procrastinating and that through your power and strength I can have victory when procrastination rears its ugly head.  Amen